In an effort to assert transparency as a primary tenant in my life, I am about to get very real with you.
Like many of you I am grappling with balance at this volatile moment in history. With our democracy hanging on by a thread and basic human rights being discarded like trash it's impossible to decipher an appropriate way to continue living, breathing, and loving.
Following the election in November I have:
- navigated ongoing depression
- faced the realities of my own privilege, naiveté, shame, and guilt
- attempted to mobilized my pain and fear into activism, outreach, and community involvement
- struggled with finding my place in this mounting hurricane of injustice
And in the midst of all that I've been planning the launch for The Avowed Podcast. I've been attempting to find purchase for my own art, career, and passion and believe me when I say it has been really fucking hard to prioritize personal endeavors when so many people are facing the brutal realities of inequality, hate and prejudice.
If you know how to reconcile the push and pull of these opposing pieces in your life - please share. I have by no means landed on a solution... but here is where I am, right now.
I'm lucky enough to have been given the gift of creativity and sometimes, particularly in times like these, that gift feels inadequate. How am I supposed to help those in need with story telling and design? How could I possible make a dent in the suffering around me with a podcast, or cake?
And then I remember it's not that simple. The war on truth, integrity, and humanity is mounting and it's going to be a long one. It will be necessary to set a manageable pace and healthy boundaries and we will all need to find ways in which to care for ourselves amidst caring for others. We will need to give priority to joy and celebration between heated bouts of activism. That is how the soul replenishes itself. It is the very reason the entertainment industry urges forward, even reaching new heights, in our society's darkest times.
Carrie Fisher, who's death rocked my world in truly unexpected ways, once said "Take your broken heart and make it in to art."
To me this says: spit in the face of darkness and cruelty with empathy, passion, and joy.
I guess I'm trying to say it would seem a poetic disservice to ourselves, and the lives we are fighting to protect, to forget ourself in war... to loose what makes us beautiful and worth saving in the first place.
So I'm starting a podcast about love.
I am overwhelmed with inspiration for upcoming episodes, and deeply affected by the interviews I have already recorded. I am urged forward amidst this terrifying time of political unrest, by the concept of love. A concept so uniquely human and commonplace we devote ourselves to it fully without ever discussing what it is...
What is love, and what is marriage?
Is marriage an abstract concept? A signed document? Words spoken at an alter?
HOW are we getting married?
What is the difference between a wedding and marriage?
Where do our expectations clash with reality?
And yes, I want to get a little conceptual. I want to dive deep and swim around in uncertainty in case we are better able to understand ourselves on dry land. I am eager to speak with individuals and couples from all walks of life about how these intrinsic human issues have touched their lives, and try to pin down what a successful relationship and marriage are built on.
I also want to give voice to the unbelievable people working inside this powerhouse industry! It feels like the word "industry" implies a certain lack of soul, but in reality this is not an industry comprised of large corporations. This is built on the backs of small businesses, run largely by creative and rebellious female entrepreneurs. This is an industry run by woman, predominantly for woman, celebrating what was originally an exchange of women as property.
If that doesn't blow your mind and then reassemble it, than I would suggest reading it again.
What I'm getting at is that love and marriage encompass many nuanced concepts and pertinent social issues.
Feminism + Capitalism + History + Hope + Fear + Sex + Communication + Trust + Laughter + Money + Family + Tradition + Expectation
The whole gang's there.
Love and marriage are anything but simple.
So let's talk about it.